Obviously
one can see that this is a suggestion from one person based on
perceptions and personal experiences. Please find a way to pick out the
positive impact this should have on you and never allow its full content
make you who you are. Its very purpose is to help us channel our
energies to the real thing one should be looking for in a man.
1. The Unmarried Man - This may seem obvious, but it is very necessary
to mention. There are too many women attempting have relationships with
married men. Married men are not a candidate for single women to date… period! This includes married men who are separated (legally or otherwise). They are still married and not available to date. Married people have their own families and concerns to deal with. That being said, the unmarried man, who is devoted to the things of God, is the type of man you should be interested in dating. (1 Corinthians 7:32-35).
2. The Kingdom Seeker - A man who is seeking God’s Will for His life will, not only seek out a woman to date,
but will seek out his wife. The Bible says, “But seek first the kingdom
of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to
you” (Matthew 6:33). Ladies, you should be an asset; the thing that is
*added* to him as he is FIRST seeking the kingdom of God. This is why I
say, run as fast as you can for Jesus and the one who can keep up might be the one.
3. The Real Man - No,
I am not talking about machismo behavior (all the shoulders back, chest
out, fist curling gestures and such)… Real men don’t need all of that.
That’s what grown-boys do to get a woman’s
attention. Real men “pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace” (2.
Timothy 2:22). Real men regard women as a gift that is not to be taken
advantage of; they see her as priceless and desire to cling to her
(Matthew 19:5). A real man’s character shows his high regard for a woman long before the dating stage.
4. The Learner - A
man who is in continual pursuit of knowledge is better equipped to
handle life and execute on goals / plans. He should read, seek counsel,
study continuously, etc… The Bible says, “Without counsel plans fail,
but with many advisers they succeed”( Proverbs 15:22). Also, “My people
are destroyed because of lack of knowledge” (Hosea 4:6). A man who is
willing to learn and gain knowledge in life should also be more open to
gaining knowledge about love and having successful relationships.
5. The Multiplier -A
man shouldn’t just balance you out, he should constantly add to you.
His presence should multiply your potential. He should add to the beauty
of who you are and never take away from anything that is precious about
you. ( “Relationship Coaching: Do you multiply or divide?”) The Bible
says, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.’” (1
Corinthians 15:33). The man you date should
never cause you to compromise good morals. He should seek ways to
support you in your values. His values should complement yours.
6. The Servant – A
man who has demonstrated a pattern of submitting to authorities in his
life (leadership, pastors, parents, etc…) will also have an
understanding of how to submit to God as the head of his life and,
subsequently, how to commit to his future wife. The Bible says, “Obey
your leaders and submit to them… Let them do this with joy and not with
groaning,” (Hebrews 13:17). His positive attitude towards authority
figures is an indication of his servant’s heart and also provides a
picture of how he can be in a dating relationship.
7. The Consistent Man - Emotions
rise and fall, but character shows with consistency. The consistent man
is not in a rush because he does not have poor intentions, nor is he
interested in manipulating a woman to be led by her emotions (“ Warning:
Don’t Follow Your Heart”). He will take his time to get to know you and
will allow you to get to know him as well. The Bible says, “Whoever
walks in integrity will be delivered, but he who is crooked in his ways
will suddenly fall.” (Proverbs 28:18). Over time, the consistent man’s
good character will still stand, while the man with bad intentions will
also come to light.
Remember,
the purpose of dating is to get to know a person. If you take your time
to get to know him, you will be able to find out if he is the type of
man you should date.
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